So many of us invest time
and energy in trying to fit in or trying to be what others, including our
clients, are looking for. In the process
of doing so, we sacrifice a great deal of what is true: true for ourselves, true for our path. In doing so, we give up pieces of our
identity and our purpose.
A key that is many success
keys in one is Authenticity – being our truest and highest self. We know we have found this point in our lives
when we can honestly say, “I am who I am.
I do what I do. If people like me
and want to work with me or be with me being who I am, than that’s great. And if not, well that’s okay too.”
It takes effort to reach
this life position. It takes self
examination. It takes a willingness to
answer important questions like: Who am
I really? What is it that I most want
out of life? What is it that I most want
to do? What is my life purpose? How can I best benefit others and myself?
These are tough questions to
consider and tough questions to answer yet answers can be found. Sometimes, the answers change as we
change. After all, that’s part of
growth. Stagnant life positions are a
lot like stagnant water – swamp like and smelly.
So how do we find the
answers to these very challenging questions?
Well, how would you help a client answer these questions? They are just as important with your clients,
whether you offer life coaching or business coaching, as they are for
ourselves.
Some might consider
journaling or essaying. Some might
consider meditation or contemplation.
Some might consider sitting down with a good friend, a mentor, or a
coach and starting to work through defining, dissecting, re-defining, and
re-thinking the answers in order to progressively come closer to our most
accurate definitions of “who am I.” They
are multiple venues in which to work through these – all equally valid.
What are the results? From my own experience and the experience of
my clients, I can say that increased happiness is one. Others include a better sense of self, a
clearer mission and vision, and the ability to take just a few more risks in
order to have what we want.
We all have so much to offer
others and ourselves, or ourselves and others.
That can be done best, most thoroughly, most effectively when we are
coming from a place of our truest and best self, a place of authenticity.
As Howard Thurman said, “Don't
ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because
what the world needs is people who have come alive.”
As Eleanor Roosevelt said,
“Do what you feel in your heart to be right, for you'll be criticized anyway.
You'll be damned if you do and damned if you don't.”
And, as Neil Simon said,
“Don't listen to those who say, ‘It's not done that way.’ Maybe it's not, but
maybe you will. Don't listen to those who say, ‘You're taking too big a
chance.’ Michelangelo would have painted the Sistine floor, and it would surely
be rubbed out by today. Most importantly, don't listen when the little voice of
fear inside of you rears its ugly head and says, ‘They're all smarter than you
out there. They're more talented, they're taller, blonder, prettier, luckier
and have connections…’ I firmly believe that if you follow a path that
interests you, not to the exclusion of love, sensitivity, and cooperation with
others, but with the strength of conviction that you can move others by your
own efforts, and do not make success or failure the criteria by which you live,
the chances are you'll be a person worthy of your own respect.”
What could possibly be more
important than being worthy of our own respect?
When we find our own authenticity, we find it all.
